This is an interview with Lesley Carter. Lesley is 51 and was a member of the armed forces for 10 years, serving in Cyprus, Northern Ireland, Hong Kong and Germany, after which she returned to civilian life, building a long-term career as a project manager for Gaz de France before giving up her job, selling her house and embarking on her Italian adventure back in March 2006.

Lesley moved to Italy in order to be together with her partner – now husband – Keith. It was quite a culture shock – moving from suburban Telford to rural Liguria! In this interview, Lesley tells us about her experience two years on….

Q: What did you expect life to be like in Italy before you moved?

Different from my previous life, certainly in terms of day-to-day living, as I was giving up a full-time office-based job in England and not moving into regular employment once in Italy. My new life would, essentially, be centred round the house and land, with some home-based work. Although I was looking forward to this, my reservation was that in reality I would get bored with manual labour and that there would not be enough intellectual stimulation for me. As for the physical move to another country, this didn’t bother me, as I have previously lived in a number of different countries and experienced different cultures, albeit under the “protection” of military bases. I had, for a long time, felt like I didn’t belong in England and I was looking forward to the change.

Q: How does that compare with your actual experience, two years on?

Practically speaking, there has been no time to be bored. With house improvement projects and taking care of the land, there is always something that needs doing. One of my great joys has been to be able to live for the most part outside and work on the land. Cultivating crops is a whole new learning curve for me and has proved very satisfying. Cooking the fruits of my labours equally so! Also, I have been able to apply my work skills to managing the house improvement projects. Having the time and space to run your day as you please is wonderful. However, without the necessity of going out to work in the morning, there is a tendency to be lazy and a bit of self-discipline is required to keep motivated.

Q: What was the worst bureaucratic challenge you had to face?

I have been very lucky in that many of the major bureaucratic challenges of living abroad had already been covered by my partner prior to my move to Italy, so the only obstacle for me was getting my residency. I just happened to apply when the process was in the throes of changing, so I ended up being passed from pillar to post before finally getting my ID card.

Initially I applied to the main police station with various forms of identification and proof of income. The police (after a very long wait) informed me that my application was now to be processed through the main post office – the new process. So, after completing and submitting new forms given out by the post office, I was then informed that it should be dealt with by one particular post office. Upon presenting the forms yet again, I was then told that the local town council anagrafe office now dealt with this. Another queue, another hour, another day, only to find out that my local council could process the whole thing very easily and speedily, which they did! Hopefully renewals will be infinitely easier!

Q: What has been the hardest challenge so far?

Keeping my confidence up and not giving in to feeling like a simpleton most of the time. I am generally very independent and living here has meant that I have had to be dependent on a lot of people for support so far, especially my partner. Things that I wouldn’t normally think twice about doing on my own have become a two person affair (or three or four, depending on who gets involved) – going to a doctor, a trip to hospital, banking, going to the hairdressers. Even things like organising a service for the boiler or dealing with builders is something I would have tackled without batting an eyelid. Now I have to defer to another for help. I know all of these things will change over time with effort on my part, but it is quite a major blow to be so suddenly dependent and “lost”.

Q: What do you miss about the UK?

There are aspects of convenience and customer service that I miss. For example, the postal service. Posting out from here is usually fine, but receiving mail and especially parcels can be hit and miss. You will get them – eventually. However, put in the hands of a courier, the item may well end up being returned to the UK. Courier companies often sub-contract to local businesses here that may not want to be bothered driving further than the main town. As and when they do, the item can have sat in the main office for weeks already.

Another example is shopping. In the UK, shopping is generally easier and more customer friendly. You can shop without fear of having second thoughts on your purchase as there is nearly always a generous returns policy. Whereas here in Italy, once you have bought an item, that’s it, you have very little, or no, room to return or exchange unless faulty. This makes it especially difficult if you are buying for someone else, or if you are buying a DIY item that doesn’t suit your purpose.

I also miss polite queuing (a very English thing I know). On a recent trip to the hospital it took a while for me to realise that the fact I had been given a time to see the consultant meant very little. It seemed the more insistent and pushy people were, the quicker they were seen. Not something I could comfortably emulate, but in the end I realised that if I didn’t stand my ground I would have been there all day. Thankfully not every visit was the same and on the whole, the care and service given once you are in the system is (in my experience) fabulous.

Q: Are there any TV programmes/radio programmes you miss?

Radio 4 and Wimbledon. Apart from that none specifically, except maybe the odd drama on a cold wet afternoon. On the up side, I can now get Radio 4 through the internet. In our current location we are not quite on broadband, but getting there – slowly.

Q: What foods do you miss?

From a cooking point of view I don’t actually miss any foods in particular, but there are a couple of things that I like to have to hand that I have to ask visitors to bring with them, like Marmite, gravy browning and suet. Most other ingredients I have successfully found here, or if not, an equivalent alternative or I have adapted how I make things. Rather than miss anything I am still delighting in using the abundance of new (to me) ingredients to experiment with.

From an eating out perspective, there appears to be a lack of multi-cultural cuisine. A recent trip to London, with its endless choices, highlighted this fact. In my main town here, there are only two Chinese restaurants that I know of, and that’s it. There may be more in larger towns. That said I haven’t begun to exhaust the wealth of good restaurants that do exist here.

Q: What have you been pleasantly surprised about living in Italy?

Most surprising is the amount I play my saxophone. I thought it would end up in a corner of the room, but it – and I – are employed throughout the year via the local band. This has been an invaluable link with the community for me, without which I would not have witnessed or been part of some significant moments in the town’s culture. It has also enabled me to make some very good friends which I probably wouldn’t have done as a tourist or “ex-pat” Brit living abroad.

Q: In what ways has your life changed after almost three years in Italy?

Irrespective of my current level of language (improving daily) my social life is a lot richer. In the relatively short time I have been here, more people know me and I know more people than I ever did in my hometown in the UK. My diet is also better, although it is easy to overdo the quantities.

Q: If you could change one thing about life in Italy, what would it be?

My freedom of speech….and I don’t mean from a political angle. Without being fluent in Italian it is hard to strike up a conversation beyond what the weather is doing. I miss having “real” conversations with people and being able to talk freely without first pre-preparing what I am going to say. I have joined the local town band and when we are rehearsing I long to join in with the pre-practice banter that goes on. I can understand some of what is thrown back and forth, but am not quick enough to respond – I also have to remember that most of it is dialect anyway, so I haven’t a hope yet. There are days when I feel incredibly stupid and certainly feel like it appears so to others.

On the plus side I know this is something I can change and day by day my language skills are improving.

Q: What words of advice would you give to someone thinking seriously about moving to Italy permanently?

It isn’t all sunshine. Learn the language, learn the language, learn the language – and even then you will need to learn the local dialect! Don’t expect anything instantly. There is a lot of leg work involved with almost everything. For me it is worth it.

Interesting isn’t it? Are you thinking of doing the same thing? There are many ways in which The Overseas Guides Company can help you, both with the Italy Buying Guide and with recommendations of really good professional people who can help you with your search. Obtain your free mini-guide here.